I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I'm reffing a fight in Fight Club I don't even know what I'm doing
I never woulda thought that back in kindergarten playong kickball that'd i'd be 24 getting plastered in front of the white house and winning a kickball championship in a young adult drinking league
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
thank god my bra was in my purse... were all good
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