Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
Come on there are only so many drink coaster sizes nipples in the world
CAN I WEAR ASSLESS CHAPS TO SUNDAY BRUNCH OF JUDGEMENT????
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
I woke up at 5am to tell him I wanted to take his dick on la Tour de France, I might need a nap later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
I accidentally sent my dad a very explicit Star Wars fanfiction and he replied with "That was great!"
It was probably bad to sleep with someone just to pet his dog right?
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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