Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
Randomize
