At least make sure they are 18
Why
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I learned much from the teen babysitter: I can light a cigarette in a microwave.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
We don't have the same problems as normal people do we?
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
