So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
Did Neil Armstrong say the moon was too far away! NO! He built himself a fucking rocketship is what he did!
I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
you were so drunk you slurred your pauses
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I bought more beer than I could carry and managed to fit it all in the fridge. It's an alcoholicmas miracle.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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