i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
i found the vodka. it was hiding in the orange juice.
batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
