Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I'll get him an axe as a present. So he can break out of his closet. That axe being my penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
You are a genius and a whore.
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
Randomize