What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
So I thought I was slick leaving his room this morning all incognito. Little did I know I was wearing his football jersey with his name across the back... stilettos & my bra was left behind. never seeing that again
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Maybe I'm just didn't notice and imagined a different penis as a Freudian coping mechanism?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
He said the pain stops when I get my shit together and stop being a drugged out alcoholic mess. Could have just said no.
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
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