i don't like sucking hair
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
He's literally cuddling with the washer and dryer.
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
