Every time we go downtown I ask myself why we live in Des Moines
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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