She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
I just used a tire swing as a toilet. I think I'm gonna pass out here so I can see the look on the first kid who uses it in the morning.
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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