my mother just offered to pay for my fake id.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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