so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
A lot of things don't look good... It doesn't look good for a lifeguard to be smoking a cig and drinking from a conspicuous cup... But hey I'm doin it
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I'm surprised they let us keep partying at that hotel bar, that's like the 3rd time I've had to try blocking the view of him peeing off the balcony. I earn my free drinks.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Randomize