i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
You know you're doing college wrong when you have to bail your RA out of jail
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
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