There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
She's better-looking with the mask on.
Randomize
