Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Randomize
