dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
"You're the only girl I haven't made out with yet" = worst pick up line ever
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
