He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
