i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
How do I politely say my vagina is not a chew toy and if you bite me again I will slap you?
You could say take it easy, whoa there, be gentle, anything that doesn't fully convey the horror.
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Home-made laxative recipe: activia yogurt and tequila shots. Any ratio ought to work.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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