when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
