The duggars are the reason premarital sex is ok. Because if you don't have it until marriage you have no self control when it happens. And 19 kids.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
Hypothetical Question: Would you take a cougar bullet for me?
Uh, he still talks to you after you basically sexually harassed him using emojis?
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
