Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
420 ftw
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
Yea we just broke up
so do we start sexting now or later?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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