I need to go to a fraternity... my boobs are telling me to.
i don't know how to normally transition into sexual activities without being drunk...
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
I've see this movie. You sext me after the bar and fall asleep mid sentence. Roll credits.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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