he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I hear fucking Christmas music. I'm going to find fucking Santa and tell him to suck a dick and shut up for the next month
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
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