are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
Because I'm currently dying, lacking waffles, and vaguely convinced I'm an eagle
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
