and i looked up. we had an audience...
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
And they're not making a turkey. My cousin was "hoping to shoot a bird this week"
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
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