Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
just upper decked a verizon store cause they don't cover against "getting phone crushed by a keg." had to pay 175 for a new one
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
S.O.S. he's talking about horses and breast feeding.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
We broke into a construction site had sex on a scissor lift and realized it was a church...tomorrow again??
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
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