So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
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I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
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