What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I just want nice things and good sex
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Randomize
