im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
I feel like you just avenged me for every guy who came in my hair
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Look. If you're going to be my girlfriend you need to be down with me licking BBQ off your face infront of kids.
It's an open bar. I'm gonna be gone when you get here.
Text me the address now before you're too drunk to text English.
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Something I can get at drive through, boobs out, don't want to get out of the car
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
Randomize
