why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present.
so after all day drinking, we went to an all u can eat crab place and i was going from table to table surveying the crowd if they though the crab i was carrying around looked like the flying dog from never ending story...what the hell is wrong with me?
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
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