Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
i walked into the first stall,, but there was no paper, so i'm in the other one. a little kid is in the one without paper now and is making a lot of noise. curious how this'll turn out for him.
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Omg!!!! Call me in the morning I just saw A stripper queef out a dollar
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
My legs feel like baby dolphins
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
Randomize
