hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
She is the epitome of a puke & rally. She picked a random hott guy at the bar & made him pinky promise not to leave while she took a power nap. She went & passed out in her friends car & apparently puked just outside the bar. She stumbled in & found the randome guy again & claimed she was golden. Made it to the after party & stayed up til 6 doing body shots off every girl she saw & hooked up with the random from the bar. I love her life
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Sometimes, it’s important to take a moment and kinkshame yourself.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
