i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
you left him a drunk voicemail of you singing speechless by lady gaga balling your eyes out
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
Randomize
