What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
Nick just found a baggie of 3 year old shrooms in his desk drawer and downed it all with cheap white wine. I am not on vomit duty tonight.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Not to make this awkward, but if we ever have sex (perhaps drunkenly), all i'm gonna be able to think about is how sexy our kids would be.
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