Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
So after I was tied with a feather boa he left me there with KFC and cherry coke
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wonder if they have a "21st birthday" section in the hospital..
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
I stopped hooking up with him and ran to the bathroom to throw up. He saw me throwing up and it made him throw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
After an orgasm, I always feel the urge to sing A Whole New World from the move Aladdin and I'm not quite sure why.
sometimes you just have to listen to beyonce and cry. that's how life works
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize