Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
