you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
The cab driver just finished telling me how leaving community college after one month was the best desicion he ever made.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
his semen tasted like maple syrup. no wonder fat girls always wanna fuck him.
nothing worse than sitting down ready for a solid porn sesh to find out your internet is out. comcast owes me a handjob
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
What happened to fro yo and sex?
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
Randomize
