marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
You're breaking my sexual little heart
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
I climbed on the arm of the futon, flapping my hand fan frantically and hissing imprecations at the smoke detector
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