So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
So fucked up. Can't tell if I'm starving or about to puke. Playing it safe and eating froot loops. Tasty in, colorful out.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize