im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Last night was fun but it wasn't right. I will say that our lives intersected for a brief and intense moment and we will just leave it there.
We're about to get drunk and it feels wrong without you
Randomize
