We won't sleep together?
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I don't know if you remember, but I was only wearing an afghan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"too many" and "free shots" never belong in the same sentence
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
He was so hammered. He called the cops on the landscapers he thought they were trespassing. 2 were arrested on warrants.
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
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