Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Randomize
