Um, that's called prostitution
Not if I leave it on the nightstand, then it's called cab money
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
The feeling are messing with the penis
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize
