Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
It made me want to take you home, put you in footie pajamas and feed you spaghettios
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
Randomize
