you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
just turned my empty handle of passion fruit smirnoff into a fish bowl. I love college.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
We need to talk about the sailor moon porn. Do what you want in your room, but I don't want to come home to you cranking it on the couch to that.
Because of my cut offs, my brother is convinced I fucked a girl so hard she forgot to take her pants. Fairly accurate.
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
Randomize
