I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
he pulled a hernia and i had to get the morning after pill. you tell me how our valentines day went.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
Randomize