She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
25 Of The Most Common Life Mistakes Young People Make
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
25 People Confess What They Really Think When They See An Obese Person
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?