so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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