Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
