hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
The only thing worse than listening to you two fuck all night was waking up and smelling bacon and there not being any left.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Well sundance is in town and Im going to use my one and only shot to bang Taylor swift... Does it count as a random if shes famous?
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
