my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
it was funny though when you first woke up you pointed at my shoe and said i need my jacket and then put my shoe on your hand
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Found a cheerleading trophy in my shower this morning. Explain.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
i tried to climb in the window in the limo because i wanted the driver to take me to get noodles. ive reached a new level of fat kid
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
Randomize
