I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
Take my keys. Load me into the vehicle. Drive. Get food. Come back. These are my demands.
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
At the end of the white elephant exchange, our professor had a big black dildo around her neck and I won a full body dinosaur suit. I could die tomorrow with no regrets.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
